In 2015, the daily Pravda asked, “Alcohol is winning in the country. How to change that?” If you travel in Slovakia, you will encounter cheap booze and a very hospitable culture of drinking. So how can you not drink alcohol in Slovakia?
A Drinking Culture with a Mountains Problem
Together with other Central/Eastern European countries, Slovakia leads European statistics in alcoholism and related diseases, with rates increasing since the 2008 crisis.
Slovaks aged 15 and over drink 13 liters of pure alcohol per year, of which 46 percent is spirits, 30 percent is beer, and 18 percent is wine. This places Slovakia as the world’s #10 country (incidentally, tied with the Czech Republic), according to the World Health Organization.
A sociologist quoted in the Pravda article states the causes behind the phenomenon include
- widespread availability in stores;
- low prices springing from low taxes;
- the fact that alcohol serves as a substitute for more expensive drugs or medications; and
- traditions encouraging drinking on every occasion.
In the companion article to the Pravda article titled, “People who don’t drink are considered extra-terrestrials”, a psychologist quoted opines that the causes of alcohol drinking and alcoholism in the country are deeply rooted in history and the evolution of lifestyles, including the tradition of illegal distillation of spirits in villages, longer working hours, and economic pressures combined with financial stress.
A Slovak who doesn’t drink is considered an alien, disrupting a societal stereotype.Alica Kantorková, Center for Drug Addiction Treatment
The phenomenon inspires not only a lot of pontification and head-shaking, but also humor.
In 1981, the famous comic duo Lasica & Satinský had a skit about drinking in Slovakia. The skit culminated with the Jaro Filip-authored song, “In Our Village,” which opens with these lyrics:
In our village everybody drinks
except for George.
Everyone is wondering
what’s wrong with him.
He’s just like us,
healthy, strong, and stingy,
so why does he
distance himself from us like this?
The problem with George, who, it turns out, simply doesn’t like the taste of alcohol, gets resolved when the angry villagers stick a pitchfork in his behind.
The satire underscores the cultural aspect of drinking in Slovakia.
Alcohol in Slovakia: A Personal Experience
When I was a boy, growing up in Košice, from about elementary-school age my father would let me and my sister sip the foam off his beer at the pub near our family’s weekend cabin.
In high school, I’d sometimes sneak out during afternoon free periods to buy beer at a nearby grocery store, which my friends and I would drink right outside (some of my classmates would go further and pound a few beers at a brewery down the street). During a Cassovar Brewery excursion each student drank a full glass of unpasteurized beer under the supervision and a toasting hand of our home-room teacher.
In college, well, we all know what happens in college.
Here in Portland, Oregon, where I live, expatriate / exile / emigré Slovaks and Czechs meet monthly at a brew pub.
Drink because your glass is full. Pour a drink because your glass is empty.
Eastern Slovak aphorism
Tips for Staying Sober in Slovakia
Despite the fact that alcohol in Slovakia is cheap, even after 10 years in the European Union; that drinking is a national sport; and that “No” isn’t commonly taken for an answer, it is possible to not drink. Just follow one of more of these simple tips:
- Don’t go anywhere. You won’t be tempted to drink if you stay away from places that serve alcohol. This pretty much rules out cities and villages (it is said that every village has a church and a pub). Even mountains can be tricky: there are few pleasures Slovakia offers that beat a cold brew at a chalet at the end of a long hike. Stay in your hotel, avoid dorms or hostels, or go to only galleries, museums, and churches (except during mass).
- Visit in shoulder season. In summer you’ll be thirsty for beer, and in winter, which can get pretty darn cold in places (negative 20 degrees Celsius), you’ll want to warm up with Slovak spirits. Therefore, avoid traveling to Slovakia during these periods. Also the wine harvest season and Easter. Spring or fall rains will also help you stay indoors. But then, who wants to tour around in the rain?
- Make no friends and visit no families. Peer pressure is the worst factor in drinking. If you meet Slovaks, chances are they will make it a goal to get you drunk, especially if you make the mistake of mentioning you don’t drink much. In addition, the custom in Slovakia is to consider every no just a step toward yes; Slovaks will keep offering, if only to demonstrate their hospitality and so that you won’t say you were left thirsty or hungry, until they annihilate your defenses and you say yes just to stop them from asking. Avoid interacting with the locals at all cost.
Slovaks on Not Drinking
In all seriousness, you can stay sober in Slovakia the same way you can stay sober anywhere else: by not drinking too much. If you don’t want to drink at all, just say no.
This is a conclusion my fellow Slovak travelers and bloggers drew when I asked, in the Facebook group Digital Nomads of Slovakia, for their tips how to avoid drinking alcohol in Slovakia. Interestingly enough, there are many non-drinkers among the traveling Slovaks, many of whom left the country to get away from the culture, the same way many Americans do.
- Ivana Grešlíková: “To avoid alcohol anywhere in the world is easy—just don’t drink it. The first step is to politely decline. Then it depends on why you wish not to drink and stick with it. Every hesitation only encourages the person offering to continue doing so. I like to say, in jest, that “I’ve drunk my share in my life time,” which tends to work. I also tell people that quitting alcohol and smoking allowed us to save for our travels. Finally, it helps to ask the host about his or her life, especially stories related to alcohol, which not only distracts them but also demonstrates that rather than judging them you’d prefer to toast with juice.”
- Ľubo Jurík: “It depends on the traveler. If you visit Slovakia for its nature and to hike, it’s easy to avoid alcohol. If you come as a digital nomad and stay a while to live in a city and learn about the Slovak culture, it’ll be difficult. It’s almost impossible particularly in winter time because most people get together in pubs or bars. In such cases it’s up to the individual traveler to not drink.”
- Andrej Staš: “I solved a large part of the problem by ordering only non-alcoholic beer. I don’t think the situation in Slovakia is so bad anyway.”
- Alexandra Kováčová: “If you don’t want to drink, focus on [Slovak] food. Or mountains and fields and beautiful Slovak girls, who increasingly dislike drunk men. So my advice for those who want to woo an intelligent Slovak girl is to not drink.”
An earlier version of this article appeared at Where Is Your Toothbrush?